at times she’s quiet
at times she’s full of talk
at times she’s cranky
at times she’s a joy
these are the times
memories so full
one grandchild can only recall

way past midnight and yet she’s still awake
always looking for people
asking for something to eat
begging for a change of clothes
requesting for some companionship
why aren’t you sleeping?
the grandchild queries..
rest is what you need
and yet she raises her brows
looks at the grandchild with glazed eyes
saying nothing
yet conveying more

her body is in need of sleep
her soul is in need of affection,
fulfillment and love she so badly wanted
yet failed to have on those past 70 years
she really need not ask
yet some of her kin failed to understand
refused to see past the woman they call “nanay”
the “nanay” who never complained when they rebelled
the “nanay” who always understood their misfortunes and misgivings
the “nanay” who quietly cries when her children fight against the other

a grandchild, young and helpless watches her
hears her silent pleas
that peace befall upon them who seek chaos
sees her pained face
that reflects the scars ingrained through time
feels her transgression
that she could have done more
but it still wasn’t enough

and the grandchild gradually understands
that “nanay” has come full circle
eyes heavy
she clings on to the light
that as the secondhand on the clock moves
she struggles to remember images of long ago
holding on to it, hoping that all that had gone wrong
may find time to make it right
that she may not remember the names
yet she remembers how her heart was at that moment

she then went Home, to Him that awaits her
so that she can smile without worry
so that she can breathe without burdnen
that her soul be content
that her body be healed
and that at the end of everyday
sleep will not elude her..

hey gran!
sleeping well?